A little girl walks in to the lounge one Sunday morning while her Dad is reading the paper.
"Where does poo come from?" she asks.
The father feeling a little perturbed that his 5 year old daughter is already asking difficult questions thinks for a moment and says: "Well you know we just ate breakfast?"
"Yes," answers the girl.
"Well the food goes into our tummies and our bodies take out all the good stuff, and then whatever is left over comes out of our bums when we go to the toilet, and that is poo."
The little girl looks shocked, and stares at him in stunned silence for a few seconds and asks: "And Tigger?"
. . . . . .
I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.
http://www.ebearweb.net
Stephen's Snaps
http://photo.ebearweb.net/
This week Gerbra & Rose photos.
Simply nice photos, Landscape, Seascape, Underwater, The Northern Beaches Sydney.
Here's a quote from a government employee who witnessed a recent
interaction between an elderly woman and an antiwar protester in a train station in Sydney.
There were protesters on the train platform handing out pamphlets on the evils of Australia. I politely declined to take one.
An elderly woman was behind me getting off the escalator and a young (20ish) female protester offered her a pamphlet, which she politely declined.
The young protester put her hand on the old woman's shoulder as a gesture of friendship and in a very soft voice said, "Lady, don't you care about the children of Iraq?"
The old woman looked up at her and said, "Honey, my father died in France during World War II, I lost my husband in Korea, and a son in Vietnam. All three died so you could have the right to stand here and bad mouth our country. If you touch me again. I'll stick this umbrella up your arse and open it."
. . . . . .
I wished the buck stopped here, as I could use a few.
http://www.ebearweb.net
Stephen's Snaps
http://photo.ebearweb.net/
This week Gerbra & Rose photos.
Simply nice photos, Landscape, Seascape, Underwater, The Northern Beaches Sydney.
Does the following apply to the ARL OR AFL?
36 have been accused of spousal abuse
7 have been arrested for fraud
19 have been accused of writing bad checks
117 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
3 have done time for assault
71, repeat 71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
8 have been arrested for shoplifting
21 currently are defendants in lawsuits, and
84 have been arrested for drunk driving in the last year
Can you guess which organization this is?
Neither, it's the 535 members of the AUSTRALIAN PARLIAMENT IN CANBERRA
The same group of Idiots that crank out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
You gotta pass this one on!
I have a blue heeler cross & I was buying a large bag of Purina Dog Food at Woollies and was in line to check out.
A woman behind me asked, "Do you have a dog ?"
On impulse, I told her that no, I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I probably shouldn't because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 25 kilograms before I awoke in an intensive care ward with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry & that the food is nutritionally complete so I was going to try it again.
I have to mention here that practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story, particularly a guy who was behind her.
Horrified, she asked if I'd ended up in the hospital in that condition because I had been poisoned. I told her no; it was because I'd been sitting in the street licking my balls and a car hit me.
"Seen my new secretary?" asked Cletus.
Yeah," his buddy Earl-Bob replied," she's gorgeous."
Well, she's a Robot, the latest model from Japan."
Jeez, that's amazing! What can she do?"
If you squeeze her left tit, she takes dictation. If you squeeze her right tit, she types 185 wpm for you. And when you screw her it feels better than the real thing."
Sounds perfect."
I got hurt once, though."
How?"
Well," Cletus grimaced, "let's just say I didn't know her ass was a pencil sharpener.."
. . . . . .
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
http://www.ebearweb.net
Stephen's Snaps
http://photo.ebearweb.net/
This week more Jacaranda photos.
Simply nice photos, Landscape, Seascape, Underwater, The Northern Beaches Sydney.
Updated regularly.
A husband and wife are on a nudist beach when suddenly a wasp buzzes into the wife's hot pussy lips and enters.
Naturally enough, she panics.
The husband is also quite shaken but manages to put her shirt and pants on, pull up his shorts, and carries her to the car.
Then they make a mad dash to the nearest doctor.
The doctor, after examining her, says that the wasp is too far in to be removed with a forceps.
The doctor then explains that the husband will have to try and entice it out, by putting honey on his dick, and withdrawing as soon as he feels the wasp.
So the husband puts honey on his dick, but because of his wife's screaming, general panic, and his frantic dash to the doctors he just can't get it up!
So the doctor says "I'll perform the procedure if your wife and you don't object."
Naturally both agree, for fear the wasp will do damage.
So the doctor quickly undresses, smears honey on his dick and instantly gets an erection.
Slowly he begins to enter the wife, then withdrawal, and then again, and again, and again. Only, he doesn't stop but continues to pound her hot pussy endlessly.
In a daze, the husband shouts, "What the Hell is going on?"
The doctor replies, "Change of plans, I'm going to drown the little bastard!"
. . . . . .
If ignorance is bliss, why aren't more people happy?
http://www.ebearweb.net
Stephen's Snaps
http://photo.ebearweb.net/
This week more Jacaranda photos.
Simply nice photos, Landscape, Seascape, Underwater, The Northern Beaches Sydney.
Updated regularly.
A British company is developing small computer chips that can store music
in women's breasts.
This is considered a major breakthrough since women complain about men
staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
. . . . . .
If you drink don't park, accidents cause people.
http://www.ebearweb.net
Stephen's Snaps
http://photo.ebearweb.net/
Simply nice photos, Landscape, Seascape, Underwater, The Northern Beaches Sydney.
Updated regularly.
